You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
We are two peas in an std pod
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
