Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
