Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Randomize
