I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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