playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
No subtext here. People are naked.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
