just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
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