They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize