YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
