just come out here and I will go home with you...
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
