Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
What did we do last night that was yellow?
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Randomize
