he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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