: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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