TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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