As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
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Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
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