therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
