wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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