Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
