Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
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I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
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