He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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