wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.