This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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