R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
