Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
