He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize