so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
