I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize