dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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