just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
