Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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