JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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