im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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