i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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