We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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