My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Barsexuality is the new black.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
His hands were made for my vagina.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
