he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I came so hard my ears popped.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize