I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Randomize