it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
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