Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
