lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
