you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize