Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
