I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
