Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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