if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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