Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
