oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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