I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
