Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Randomize
