Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
