Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Randomize
