Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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